God is really creative, I mean… just look at me every time!
I’m not lazy, I am on energy saving mode.
Life is Short – Chat Fast!
I Wonder What Happens When Doctor’s Wife Eats An Apple A Day…
Light travels faster than sound… that’s why people appear bright until they speak.
Mosquitoes are like family. Annoying but they carry your blood.
I used to think that air is free, until I bought a packet of chips.
I love my job only when I’m on a vacation.
Try to say the letter M without your lips touching.
I used to like my neighbors, until they changed their WiFi password.
We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
I didn’t say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
He who smiles in a crisis has found someone to blame.
My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right.
My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you’re ugly too.
Worrying works! 90% of the things I worry about never happen.