Virginity resembles a cleanser bubble – one prick and it’s gone.
You know you’re getting old when you begin having dry dreams and wet farts.
The main reason the expression “Women first” was developed was so folks could look at ladies’ rear ends.
There’s nothing more regrettable than awakening at a gathering and finding a penis drawn all over… aside from discovering that it was followed.
69% of individuals discover something filthy in each sentence.
Is the exact opposite thing that Tickle Me Elmo gets before leaving the industrial facility two test tickles?
Ladies might have the capacity to counterfeit climaxes, however men can counterfeit entire connections.
The last time I was inside a lady was the point at which I went to the Statue of Liberty.
Can any anyone explain why when a man speaks profanely to a lady it’s lewd behavior, yet when a lady speaks profanely to a man it’s $3.99 a moment?
Vagina – the crate a penis comes in.
I asked my significant other for what good reason she never flickered amid foreplay; she said she didn’t have time.
Life is sexually transmitted.
On the off chance that a fire-contender’s business can go up in smoke, and a handyman’s business can go down the deplete, can a hooker get laid off?
Did you find out about the man-eater who dumped his better half?
Life is a ton like a penis – delicate, loose and hanging free… at that point a lady makes it hard.
The distinction between a sweetheart and a spouse is around 45 pounds.
The distinction between a sweetheart and a spouse is around 45 minutes.
A penis resembles a Rubik’s Cube – the more you play with it, the harder it gets.
The most ideal approach to influence your better half to shout amid sex is to ring her up and reveal to her where you are.
In the event that you need to humiliate a paleologist give him an utilized tampon and ask him which period it originated from.
Suggestive is utilizing a quill, unusual is utilizing the entire chicken…
On the off chance that you don’t have confidence in oral sex, keep your mouth close.
On the off chance that a person recollects the shade of your eyes after a first date, odds are… you have little boobs.
A decent bar resembles a decent lady – alcohol in the front and poker in the back.
The contrast amongst “Ooooooh” and “Aaaaaah” is around three inches.
On the off chance that sex is a genuine annoyance… at that point you’re treating it terribly.
The speed furthest reaches of sex is 68, in light of the fact that at 69 you need to pivot.
Do you know the distinction between a G-spot and a golf ball – a person will really set aside the opportunity to search for a golf ball.
I went for a shabby circumcision – what a sham that was!
Sperm is white and pee is yellow so a man can tell if he’s coming or going.
Decent young ladies become flushed when they watch porn, great young ladies grin since they know they can improve the situation.
I viewed an extremely pitiful porn film a day or two ago – it was a genuine tragedy.
On the off chance that you cross an owl and a chicken, do you get a rooster that stays up throughout the night?
My gay companion got let go from the sperm bank since they found him drinking at work.
My companion kicked the bucket of a Viagra overdose and they couldn’t close his coffin.
I ought to have known it could never work out amongst me and my ex – all things considered, I’m a Pisces and she’s a bitch.
Vegans give great head since they’re accustomed to eating nuts.
I cherish each bone in your body, particularly mine.
Men resemble open toilets – the great ones are taken and the rest are loaded with poop.
On the off chance that a pigeon is the feathered creature of peace, at that point is a swallow the winged animal of affection?
Swarmed lifts smell diverse to smaller people.
Cowgirls resemble dairy animals taps – the more seasoned they are, the less demanding they are to get.
A prostitute is somebody who’ll have intercourse with anybody, a bitch is somebody who’ll engage in sexual relations with anybody aside from you.
Would you call an Italian hooker a pasta-tute?
You know you have a high sperm tally when she needs to bite before she swallows.
I’d jump at the chance to think inside your case.
A 6.9 is something to be thankful for spoiled by a period.
You know your better half’s bone chilling if the lights go on when you open her legs.
I was jerking off today and m